As I plug in “39” for one of the last times on my elliptical, a tear drops on the machine. It’s a few days until my fortieth birthday, and I’m sorry, but it’s a little depressing.
I am sure my memory is getting a little foggy, but I faintly remember at my Mom’s fortieth birthday party, everyone was playing shuffleboard, had those breathing tubes in their noses, and their private nurses feeding them. Back then, forty seemed so old, and now, I am going to be fucking forty!!!
“Best is yet to come”, “You look great for forty”, none of that shit helps. I don’t want to complain, except a lot to my husband, because it’s fun, and he wouldn’t know what to do with himself if I stopped complaining. But when you turn forty, it is common to take stock of your life, to question if you are where you want to be.
Did I make all the right decisions? Could I have been more than I am at this moment? Should I have gone into Olivier Martinez apartment instead of going home in that taxi. Sorry, that was the movie Unfaithful with Diane Lane, not me.
But it’s natural to ask these things. It doesn’t mean you aren’t grateful for what you have. In minute twenty-eight of my elliptical program, this is what I know. I love my family, my husband still gives me the sex nudge, my kids are great and not yet in rehab, I have great friends, I laugh every day, my ass and legs are two separate entities, and my new career is going well. My thirty-nine years of decisions and experiences in life thus far have led me to all of this. So yes, I would rather be thirty-nine, but what is the alternative?
I will be near a lot of cliffs on my birthday, and I have decided I will just use them for the views. Forty isn’t going to be so bad, and I guess there is an upside. I can start writing articles, Fabulous at Forty, Sex After Forty, Peeing After Forty.
What the F??k Is Going On With The Skin Under My Eyes After Forty? That one is coming out soon!
First of all…Happy Birthday! Second, I hear ya sister. I’m turning 40 next week. I am NOT amused. Yesterday someone told, that I’m in my sexual prime. Great. But I’d much rather be in my prime and 28. Oh well. I find myself whining and complaining that I’m heading into middle age and wishing I were younger, but honestly…like you, I have a great husband, great kids and couldn’t be happier. I wouldn’t change it for the world. Well maybe a little…thinner thighs, smaller waist, b**bs that don’t hit the ground when I bend over…but I digress.
Anyway, sorry to hijack your post, but Happy Happy Merry Merry and do as I do…Drink Heavily!
You sound like my kind of gal! Thx for birthday wishes and I couldn’t agree with you more about all the things you are feeling! As for the boobs I think there’s an app for that! I used it!
Ah! So funny. I am still not happy about my 40th and I turn 42 next week. Denial! Anyway, I’d like to say it’s not that bad, but I’d kind of be lying. (But the new career thing = great, and being over 40 has helped me not give a shit about what others think/say about me, so I feel more confident. Cheers to that!)
Perfect advice! Well I am in Los Angeles now land of youth beauty and dreams should cheer me right up! Thanks for reading and commenting! Will definitely try your drink recipes for the 4th!