Last night I attended my 12,000 thousandth back to school night. I love my daughter’s teacher! She is amazing, sweet, and truly cares about the kids.
The drill is the same at these open houses. Your teacher reviews what the kids are learning, their schedule, and their grading scale. She shows you different projects the kids have been working on in the room.
Our teacher was so complementary of the children. “They are so enthusiastic. They are so brilliant.” Now, she couldn’t look straight at me because then it would have been too obvious, but I knew she was thinking about my kid.
Last night she pointed out The AR Wall of Fame. AR stands for accelerated reader. The kids read certain books, take a test at school and accumulate points. If you have twenty points, you get on the AR Wall of Fame. “So nice, and motivating,” I say to myself. I look up. “Where the f!?# is Julia’s name?” I mean, she is on the fashion wall of fame at our house. That is really hard to get on! Is she not reading enough? I see her reading. Is she just fake reading her kindle? Am I a horrible mother? All my sacrifice for nothing! I blame Scott for ths! I read!! I show by example. Just the other night I read that Ashton and Demi were together on a plane.
I couldn’t concentrate. Should I force her to read more? Should we have library time? Could she get through 50 Shades? That’s three books. She could definitely get up to twenty points with those. How do I explain flogging to her?
As I looked around the room I knew exactly who the parents of the 20-point kids were. They were the ones taking crazy notes at the open house. Why do they need to write down when their kids have outdoor recess? To show me up, that’s why!! Me. I was drawing hearts on Julia’s Parent Questionairre. Julia loves bubble hearts.
As the Open House started to wind down, so did I. “Julia will be fine,” I say to myself. She reads every night. And now we can make bathroom time reading time too.
And by the time she takes her SATs, she will know what vociferous means.