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Welcome to Don’t Wear Sweats

jenross

I created this blog as a virtual girls night out. Some of my favorite times are with my girlfriends, sitting around laughing and sharing. Making fun of each other, ourselves, our lives.

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A Mom Makes A Big Deal Out of Small Moments

moms big moment

I apologize. I’ve taken a little break lately from my blog. I just can’t believe it’s that time again where I lose all sense of reality and sensibility and plan another child’s Bar Mitzvah. I’m actually not acting that crazy. I mean, it’s not like Scott and I are having sex, and I scream, “Yes perfect spot, right there.” and he’s all proud of himself, and I had just figured out the perfect spot at a table to put a certain couple we invited to the Bar Mitzvah.

No, … Continue Reading »



A Mom Makes Her Own 50 Shades Contract

christian grey ripped jeans

I never claimed to be that unique. So of course, last night I went with a few girlfriends to see 50 Shades of Grey. And it was great. Sure some will say it was stupid, that not much happened, that it was unrealistic. But what movie isn’t? Jennifer Lopez as a US Marshall in Out of Sight? Catherine Zeta Jones in love with an ancient Sean Connery in Entrapment? Kim K having multiple orgasms with Ray J? Please. All I know is 50 Shades brought me back to … Continue Reading »



Feeling Hungry At Sephora

Is going grocery shopping pretty much the same thing as shopping at Sephora? The first, you go in hungry, you fill up your cart, the second, you go in hungry, maybe a little insecure about your youth and beauty, and you fill up your cart.

I think I came up with the perfect ingredients while at Sephora. Tinted moisturizer, add a little lip stain, and top it off with a good mascara, and you have the perfect recipe to leave the house.

 

We all remember the Bare Minerals Commercials. I never bought into it because … <a href= Continue Reading »



A Mom Tries To Lose The Nachos

nachos

 

So I got a sonogram Monday morning to check on my fun medical issue I have. Nothing serious. But the most fun part of it was the technician telling me how gassy I was and that it was making it difficult to get a reading. She also made sure to share that she read my last report and it too basically complained of my gassiness.

What can I say. It’s true. I’m a pretty gassy person. I told her it was my IBS, which I do have, but as I … Continue Reading »



A Forty-Something Teaches A Twenty-Something Something

julia roberts big mistake

 

I have had three consistent fantasies for a good part of my adult life.

You know the first one. It’s the Pretty Woman dream. The sales lady is rude to me, and I return the next day, with a huge hat, and bags galore, screaming Big Mistake. Then I go my daughter’s soccer game in a polka dot dress, and start fixing the dirt on the field.

The second, I am sitting next to Jennifer Lopez on a first class flight from Miami to LA. She is struck … Continue Reading »



Eye Shadows To Love

I really think one of the best ways to find great makeup or beauty products is to ask the person who is looking great, wearing a great color blush or lipstick. Ask someone with great skin what they are using. Ask someone with a great ass what their workout is. Most people are very forthcoming with the information. For those who aren’t, you can always follow them home and search their garbage cans, or track their daily routine to get their hair salon or gym. single white female

Lucky for me, when … Continue Reading »



A Mom Thinks Up The Greatest Invention Ever!!

female robots

Of course at the beginning of the New Year, you think about what you want for yourself and those around you. But I have to say, I saw Jerry Seinfeld being interviewed, and he says he doesn’t make New Years’s resolutions because if he wants to change something he just changes it at that moment. I think that’s a great lesson to follow. I got rid of my forehead lines in August.

 

That being said, as I was in Target buying Huggable Hangers to make my closet clean and … Continue Reading »



A Mom Makes Her Sex Life Younger

 

healthy married sex life

If someone were to ask, “What is the sex life of couples married for eighteen plus years?” I would try to make my answer as relatable as possible.

 

The sex life of married couples of eighteen plus years is like the Sex And The City marathon you randomly catch on the E! network. You are so excited it’s happening, and you want to be involved even though you’ve seen most of them before, and usually know what is going to happen next.

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A Mom Dreams Up Parenting Rehab

 

parenting rehab

 

I’m not going to lie. This parenting thing has been kicking my ass lately. Of course, I will state the obvious. I love my kids, I love being a mom, yada yada yada. But sometimes, you go through a stretch, where the simplest comment from your husband, “Babe, I think we need to take Ben to the eye doctor, he’s squinting a lot, is met with a “ Ugh, why, I don’t want to go to another eye appointment. What does he really need to see?” Did I … Continue Reading »



Don’t Stress the Mom Stress

mom time out

 

I would say I am stressed about something daily.

 

My kids.

 

My weight.

 

My garage.

 

My gluten.

 

My kids again.

 

My husband.

 

 

 

But I feel like my handle on the stress has gotten better with age.

 

I try to follow these tips every time I feel stress coming.

 

1) What’s your damage? Simply asking yourself what you are so stressed about it this first step. A lot of times I feel overwhelmed by the numerous tasks I … Continue Reading »