Humor,

A Mom Wants Real Friends

I?m not mean. I would never make fun of a pregnant woman. It?s the most beautiful time and all women carrying a child are beautiful. Especially Alyssa Milano. She’s gorgeous!  I?m not going to point out what struck me about this picture because I?m too nice and classy, but I feel very harried in holding back. That?s all I’ll say.

Alyssa probably had a great baby shower with so many friends around her. Making her feel special and important during this wonderful time in her life. But are they true friends? Real friends?

Real Friends:

 

Tell you when your roll is hanging over jeans.

 

Tell you to shut up when you are sharing too many cute kid stories.

 

Make you drink at lunch.

 

Force you to try to raise your eyebrows to test if you got botox.

 

Pick up your sick kid from school because you are getting said injections.

 

Let you shop in their pantry so you don?t have to go grocery shopping.

 

Give dirty looks to little kids who were mean to your kid.

 

Give dirty looks to your husband when you don’t like him that day, then are nice to him when you forgive him.

 

Call you Brooke Shields and hand you a tweezer.

 

Loan you their last tampon, and assure you early menopause is around the corner.

 

Call you Betty White when you are wearing a mini skirt and shouldn?t be.

 

Assure you that forgetting the name of your kid’s teacher is completely normal, and tell you to cancel the neurologist appointment.

 

Let you know that your grandma called and she wants her underwear back.

 

Make you still run at least three errands with her after you peed a little while laughing.

 

 

And most important, give you shaving cream and a razor, in either pink or blue.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Tags: mom friendships, telling the truth to friends,