Aging, Mommy Lessons,

My Mind is Blank

remember stuff

“Kids, mommy is going up stairs to get something, be right back.”

I am upstairs, shit, what did I come up here for? I literally have no recollection.  My mind is blank.  The same blank mind when I call someone, and if it is more than two rings, I say “hello, who the hell is this?”

What is happening to me?  I have friends who try to comfort me and tell me that it happens to everyone and that us moms just have a lot to juggle in our mind.  I nod, knowing that my brain is probably shriveling as we speak.  In law school I could memorize an entire case, know the judge who ruled on it, and tell you the page it was on in the book.

Now, I put my kids’ lunch bags in the wrong backpacks, call them by their wrong names on a daily basis, and forget to shower.

I feel like I am one day away from eating all of my food with a spoon.

But then, suddenly, it came to me at 3 am this morning!  Post-its.  Isn’t their main purpose to help you remember all the little stuff? I can post-it note my family so I don’t forget what I need to do with each one of them.

My oldest:

My Name is Ben.

I am first born.

I am pre-teen and cute.

I am going to be a f!!@@ing nightmare.

Please don’t try to make eye contact with me or conversation.

I do love you, though.

My middle son:

My name is Jack.

I am the middle child.

I am okay with that.

I don’t need much.

Let me watch Family Guy.

Brush my hair.

I am really funny.

My daughter:

My name is Julia.

I won’t wear post-its, they clash with my outfit.

I stomp my feet.

Answer me the first time I call your name.

Please don’t pay attention to anyone else.

My ball and chain :

My name is Scott:

Have sex with me.

Stop shopping.

What the f?!k are you writing?

Breakfast for dinner is not fun.

Dogs:

Clean up our crap.

 

I think I can run a tighter ship with these post-its.  I vow to remember more, and tend to my family’s needs better now that they are wearing sticky notes.

Shit, I am late to get the kids.

Helpful Tips: It really is nearly impossible to remember all of your kids’ stuff and your stuff. As soon as I get a notice in their backpacks I take care of it.  If I don’t do it, it goes into the our home’s Bermuda Triangle.  As soon as they get a project, I put the date on the fridge.  If they need something for school, I put post-its at the door we leave from in the morning.  I have a filofax calendar and a calendar in my phone.  I put appointment dates in both.  Go easy on yourself, you might still forget stuff, but at least we are trying!  (You can always blame the kids for not giving you the field trip form.)

Jen Ross, Author “Don’t Wear Sweats Or Your Husband Will Leave You”

 

 

 

 

 

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